7 Outrageous + Likely Caffeinated Ways Jess Would Spend $1,000
I know I’m a fabulous role model to the young people, so I thought I would share how I would spend your $1,000.
As I’m sure you have heard, we are giving you a chance to win $1,000 every single weekday… twice! That means that at the end of every weekday, we will have given away $2,000 total. That’s not a bad deal. Plus, we’re giving you these chances through the rest of the month. That is a ton of cash…
So, I thought since I’m so influential and so gracious and so modest (sarcasm, on all parts)… I wanted to share some ways that I would spend that money. I’m not eligible to win, so think of these as ways you could spend your money.
Financial future, schminancial future. I’m talking about investing this chunk of cash in what really matters. Cheeseburgers. Sure, we already have these delicious sandwiches in our midst, but they are high in calories and fat. Can we please get a burger that not only tastes delicious and fatty, but doesn’t go directly to my thighs and saddlebags? And don’t you dare use the words “turkey burger” in my presence.
Does anyone remember the movie Richie Rich? You know, back when Macaulay Culkin was worthy of our school girl crushes and still had all of teeth? He had the coolest house! From rollercoasters to McDonald’s he had it all. $1,000 won’t get you all that Richie had (certainly not your face carved into a mountain or anything), but I think we could pick one small item off of his amenities list and upgrade our current living condition.
That whole Richie Rich thing got me thinking. His family had their faces carved into a mountain. How about we get ourselves a statures or plaque right here in the city? What’s the occasion, you ask? Nothing! That’s the beauty of it. Haven’t you always wanted to be someone? I’ve always wanted to be that statue in the middle of a busy traffic circle, like in New York or something. You’re big enough to be a landmark, but no one can get close enough to see if you actually did anything deserving of the stone frame.
“The Jess Rose Endowment Scholarship Fund.” I don’t know about you, but I’m liking the sound of that. I’m proud of the university I attended, Baylor. It would be pretty darn cool to be able to help a kid out when it comes to following in my footsteps. Full ride? Not even close. BUT I could take a chunk out of room and board or even the textbook load. My qualifications would be good grades, community service, extracurriculars, and breaking a record…. After all, I do have a reputation to uphold.
I know, it doesn’t have the same ring to it as the other big words I used (because it’s not real), but $1,000 could certainly start one heck of a chain reaction at Starbucks. I can see it now… I roll up to Starbucks and place my tried and true order. Sausage and cheddar sandwich with a vanilla latte. This runs me about eight bucks. That leaves $992 for the rest of the people waiting in line before me. With an average of $10 a person, that’s roughly 100 people caffeinated for FREE. I’d get there real early too, like right when they open. That way the early risers would get a treat too.
Not bottle service for me. Never for me. I’m too big of a dance-like-no-one-is-watching kind of gal sweating it out on the dance floor to be stuck at a table with people you can’t even talk to because the music is too loud. BUT I believe that everyone who enjoys the night scene should feel like a VIP at least once in their life. So, go out, have a few drinks, find some deserving people like a bachelorette party or someone’s birthday and give them the night of their life. Tell the host to hook them up and it’s on the house. They never have to know it’s me.
Have you ever just wanted to do something incredibly nice for someone else, but you didn’t think you could afford it? $1,000 could definitely help you pay it forward. A couple of years ago, I made a list of 30 things I wanted to do before I turned 30 and on it I put “give someone a $100 tip.” It’s always been a dream of mine to do this for someone. The food service industry isn’t always the easiest and it can be tough to make money in it. Sometimes being outrageous means doing something you wouldn’t normally have the guts to do. Leaving a massive tip for someone? Maybe even the entire $1,000? I’d say that’s pretty outrageous.