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Charlie’s New Blonde?

Are you a woman whose turn-ons include cocaine- and porn-star-scented kisses, unfathomable dysfunction and rehabbing sitcom stars in sweatpants? Alas, you may be out of luck, because it looks like Charlie Sheen has found someone new.

On Monday, the troubled but seeminglyTeflon-coated “Two and a Half Men” star turned up at an office building in Calabasas, Calif., with a slimline, belly-baring blonde (in other words, his type) on his arm.

With cigarettes in hand, they kissed for the paparazzi, one of whom asked Sheen how he was doing.

His answer: “Winning.”

Later, a thin and tired-looking Charlie escorted his unidentified companion into the back of his ridiculously expensive Maybach.

When a photographer asked about his arm candy, the thrice-divorced porno enthusiast, whose recent party guest critiqued his alleged bedroom performance, suddenly turned coy, growling, “Why don’t you mind your own [bleeping] business?”

Find more at wonderwall.com.

Charlie Sheen
Photo by Riccardo S. Savi/Getty Images

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