Katy Perry Tells Vogue She’s Still in Love With John Mayer [Pics]
Katy Perry's first Vogue cover is stuffed with stunning photos of the singer in various glam red dresses (one looks like Adele's Grammy dress), with crimson-painted lips and among chickens and green grass. Glam mixes with nature.
But she makes some major reveals, like she is still in love with John Mayer, whom she refers to as a "broken bird," and that she has not spoken to ex-hubby Russell Brand since he texted her to let her know he was divorcing her. Say what?!
Let's work backwards. About Brand, she said, with what sounds like some diplomatic venom, "He's a very smart man, and I was in love with him when I married him. Let's just say I haven't heard from him since he texted me saying he was divorcing me December 31, 2011." That hadda hurt.
The pop diva also reveals that the funnyman is hysterical, yes, but not in the right way, at least when it came to her.
"Hysterical in some ways. Until he started making jokes about me and he didn’t know I was in the audience, because I had come to surprise him at one of his shows," Perry said, with what appears to be some residual pain and/or bitterness "So, hysterical to a point. I mean, I have to claim my own responsibility in things. I do admit that I was on the road a lot. Although I invited him time and time again, and I tried to come home as much as I possibly could. You saw that in the movie."
Her 3D doc 'Katy Perry: Part of Me' showed how brokenhearted Perry was by being separated from Brand. She also admitted that he was not edited out of the footage, since he simply wasn't present and therefore there was nothing to cut. Ouch.
Perry also shared some more details about the relationship breakdown, saying, "At first when I met him he wanted an equal, and I think a lot of times strong men do want an equal, but then they get that equal and they’re like, 'I can’t handle the equalness.' He didn’t like the atmosphere of me being the boss on tour. So that was really hurtful, and it was very controlling, which was upsetting."
She continued, "I felt a lot of responsibility for it ending, but then I found out the real truth, which I can't necessarily disclose because I keep it locked in my safe for a rainy day. I let go and I was like: 'This isn't because of me; this is beyond me.' So I have moved on from that."
Back up, back up. Clearly, something else happened that neither Perry or Brand wants to discuss. Was there another person? We don't know. But the marriage was irrevocably broken.
Perry did say that her relationship with Mayer, which ended earlier this year, was not a post-Brand rebound. It was love, and one that lingers.
"No, not at all," she said when asked about its status as a rebound. "No, I was madly in love with him. I still am madly in love with him."
So is there hope for a reunion? Don't get too excited, since the answer is probably not.
"All I can say about that relationship is that he’s got a beautiful mind,” Perry mused. "Beautiful mind, tortured soul. I do have to figure out why I am attracted to these broken birds."
Broken birds are not in the cards for her right now. She's single and okay with that. "I’m not in a relationship, I’m just on my own—I am myself in my own bed,” Perry said. "I have to be happy being alone, and I am happy. I believe that I will be loved again, in the right way. I know I’m worth it."
Damn right, girl!
Perry also revealed her humanness, saying she sometimes can't believe her career good fortune.
Since she is working on a new album, some self-doubt is creeping in. "When I am in between records, sometimes I doubt myself," she shared. "I'll be like: 'Did I just get lucky, or did I mass-manipulate the world into thinking that seven songs were worth a No. 1 position?' And then I go back into the studio and I start writing, and the true essential oil of who I am comes bubbling back up and reminds me that it's always been inside of me, that nobody can take this away no matter what comment anyone makes. It's going to be there because it's what I was born with and it’s what I've worked on my whole life."
Oh Katy. Your "realness" only serves to make us heart you more.
See the behind-the-scenes footage from the shoot, where Perry reveals her makeup secrets, here.