5 Random Truths Most Of Us Are Afraid To Admit
We all have our public persona and our private persona. Some of us get to share their public persona with you on the radio. While that persona is very similar to their private persona it's not exactly the same. I'd like to think that if we share a friendship via the radio that in person we'd be just as good of friends if we sat down to visit over coffee.
What I do know is that all of us have a little bit of a dark side. Maybe not dark as in "let's bury the body under the trailer", but dark as in private thoughts and stories that are told only among a trusted few. Actually it may be best if those particular thoughts are never allowed to be whispered even in the dark.
In the spirit of being an open book that nobody really cares to check out I will be like the Encyclopedia Britannica in the library, full of knowledge but absolutely useless unless you dare to crack my cover.
It doesn't matter whether you've actually purchased a plane ticket to go pick up a bag of charcoal, shorted out an entire high school by sticking a car key in an electrical socket, or driven a forklift into a pond. These are the life events that make you interesting. Believe it or not your political views pale in comparison to the story of the time you wet your pants while interviewing a guy on death row because he threatened to kill you. All of these things happened because you made a choice, not a good choice, but a choice just the same.
I do understand that it's a good idea to have a basic idea of how the world around you works. I also know that if you study hard and learn your lessons in school you don't have to put yourself in a position to live by your wits in a concrete jungle. I think movies have made the life of the carefree drifter seem a lot more romantic than it really is. Just because you know what dumpster has the best food or which corner to stand on to get the most beads doesn't really trump having enough knowledge to actually get a job and support your family.
If you can actually remember and understand this fact then you will never have to diet again. The reason most of us are fat is boredom. We run out of things to do or things we want to do and decide that eating is the next best option. How many times have you sat down and polished off a bag of chips when you weren't really that hungry? It's like trying to slam more fuel into a gas tank that is full. We only do it because we have nothing to do, or nothing we want to do. We use eating as the reason why the grass isn't mowed, the kids didn't get picked up, and we didn't get the chance to vote.
Let's face it most of us only laugh out loud at really funny things. Most of the people we know either online, on social media, or even on the radio aren't that funny. We are chuckle funny. We are crack a smile and nod funny. We are not throw your head back and lose control of the car funny. When someone sends me an "LOL" in response to something I have sent them I take it for what it is, a complete fabrication of their true feelings about what I have contributed. Don't send "LOL". Be honest and respond with "TWMA" that was mildly amusing. It will be the truth and both the sender and the receiver can move forward feeling better about themselves.
Being a kid is great. You get to have someone take care of your meals, they clean your room, they pack your bags, they push you around in a stroller and all you have to do is manage to not crap your pants or start a fire. You also have Carte Blanche to utter whatever the hell it is you want to say. It doesn't matter if your words are insensitive, politically incorrect, or even rational and spot on. You still get to say them without fear of getting a boot in your backside. Kids usually don't lie. If they call you fat, you are. If you have a funny growth on the side of your face, it's going to be discussed. If you stink then let's face it your hygiene is not up to par. The fact that kids will call it like they see it is the exact reason I try not to put kids on the radio. My ego is far to fragile to have the truth about me exposed.