Matthew Monagle

If you think about it, it’s kind of surprising that Tom Hiddleston is still sticking around the Marvel universe. Marvel has rarely brought back a villain for multiple movies; with the exception of Sebastian Stan’s Winter Soldier, Loki is a unique character within the Marvel universe. Of course, that shouldn’t be read as a criticism; even before characters like Spider-Man and Ant-Man were being brought to the big screen, it was Hiddleston’s god of mischief who brought charm and humor to the MCU. Any self-respecting Marvel fan will be happy to have him back.

It feels like we’ve been watching the same six or seven movies shift places on the charts for weeks now, which makes what happened this weekend such a breath of fresh air. With four new releases all cracking the charts, we’ve at least got a little bit of variety in the titles we’ll be discussing, and no The Emoji Movie near the list. I’ll put that down as a win in my book any day of the week. Here’s the estimated box office grosses as of Sunday afternoon:

If you’re like me, you’ve probably gotten a little confused about the various Godzilla adaptations currently underway in Hollywood, so let’s take a moment to clear that up. First there’s Godzilla: King of the Monsters, the sequel to Gareth Edwards’ 2014 film. You have Godzilla: Monster Planet, the animated series heading to Netflix later this year. You have the in-development sequel to Japanese franchise reboot Shin Godzilla, which technically cannot begin production until 2020. And you have Adam Wingard’s Godzilla vs. Kong, which will bring the two major monster franchises together.

Given the fact that the first Kingsman movie was a spot-on homage to James Bond movies, you’d think we’d all be excited for more of the same. More debonair spy sequences, more dangerous undercover double-speak, and more gunfights in famous locations. Instead, 20th Century Fox has flipped the script, giving us a sequel that promises a delightful sendup of American action movies as well. What would happen if James Bond and John Rambo were forced to join forces to solve an international mystery? If the early trailers and credits are any indication, we’re about to find out.

While most of the articles regarding the new Hellboy remake have focused on the lack of involvement by Ron Perlman and Guillermo del Toro, it’s worth nothing that Selma Blair’s Liz Sherman was also an integral part of del Toro’s franchise. Neither fully human nor fully supernatural, Blair’s character served as an important transition point between the film’s two worlds (as well as the main love interest of the titular character). So maybe it’s about time we poured one out for Selma Blair as well; after all, she had just as much involvement in the success of the franchise as anyone.

We’re only months away from Star Wars: The Last Jedi, and already, it’s beginning to feel like a film that will be unbearably sad for all the wrong reasons. The loss of Carrie Fisher will be made fresh by her appearance in the upcoming film, and seeing her alongside Mark Hamill for the last time  —  one assumes, anyways  —  will be a touching moment for any fans of the Star Wars franchise. No less touching will be the opportunity for Fisher’s daughter Billie Lourd to share the screen with her one last time. All in all, The Last Jedi will be the ultimate Star Wars family reunion, biological and otherwise.

Let’s brainstorm for a moment. A year ago, I tell you that Sony Pictures is giving $100 million dollars to the screenwriter of Pan and the director of Mama to make a blockbuster summer movie. Furthermore, this $100 million dollar movie will be based on a popular animated television series from the 1980s. What is your gut reaction? Are you surprised? Dismayed? Cautiously optimistic? Now what if I tell you the exact same thing, but instead of Pan and Mama, I mention Wonder Woman and It, two of the most critically and commercial successful movies of 2017? Just goes to show you how much things can change in Hollywood over just a few months.

From the moment it was first announced, David Gordon Green and Danny McBride’s Halloween remake has been the Holy Grail of horror fans everywhere. Not only do the two filmmakers have the blessing of original Halloween director John Carpenter  —  who is reportedly very happy with the script and keen on writing the score for the new movie  —  they also have the backing of indie horror studio Blumhouse Productions, which has been behind two of the breakout hits of 2017: Jordan Peele’s Get Out and M. Night Shyamalan’s Split. While fans’ reactions to the Rob Zombie remakes may be mixed, there’s nothing but good vibrations going on for Green and McBride’s reboot, and Blumhouse is keen on capitalizing on the trust they’ve earned.

Well, that’s kinda awkward timing. On Thursday of last week, the New York Times published an article titled “Attacked by Rotten Tomatoes,” an in-depth look at the popular review aggregation site and the role it may have played in this summer’s disappointing box office numbers. The article ends with a prolonged examination of the various ways that studios are trying to “battle Rotten Tomatoes on multiple fronts,” seemingly accepting the idea that Rotten Tomatoes has been bad for the movie industry (despite the fact that Rotten Tomatoes is, in fact, owned by said members of the movie industry). The article may have been an interesting read for those unfamiliar with the controversy, but for those in the know, it was old news, part of an ongoing debate that tried to argue that critics were duping poor, easily misled moviegoers.

Oh, Christian Grey and Anastasia Steele. When are those two crazy kids ever going to get together? There’s is a love story we can all relate to: she, the inexperienced college student and would-be journalist, and he, the millionaire Seattle playboy, willing to teach her in the practice of love. Would their shared appreciation for BDSM be enough to overcome their differences and help them find true love? I don’t know for sure, but based on this first teaser trailer for Fifty Shades Freed, I’m going to venture that the answer to that question is yes.

As we head deeper into September, two things have become pretty clear about 2017 box office numbers: one, Hollywood desperately needs to bounce back a little bit from the doldrums of August, and two, whoever decided to hedge their studio’s bets with a September release date for a movie about a killer clown is looking like a [profanity] genius right about now. We’ll get to all of that in a moment, but first, here are the box office numbers as of Sunday afternoon:

If you’ve never had the pleasure of encountering Halo Top ice scream, I’ve got some world-changing news for you: no longer will you need to feel bad for eating ice cream by the pint! The California ice cream company, which recently passed Ben & Jerry’s and Häagen-Dazs to become the highest-selling ice cream in grocery stores, is the current zeitgeist of low-calorie sweets. Sure, maybe the flavor is a little more bland than you’d prefer, and sure, maybe eating ice cream by the pint  —  regardless of its constitution —  is probably not the best idea, but at only 240 calories a pop? You could do a lot worse with your stress-eating.