Move over COVID-19, it's time for a taste of sports as we get ready for tonight's NFL Draft.

It's no surprise that LSU's Joe Burrow is basically a guaranteed-lock for tonight's first draft pick. After all, the Ohio native racked up the best statistical year for a quarterback in college football history in 2019 and capped his collegiate career with a Natty in 2020.

Burrow, or "Burreaux" as he'll forever be remembered in Louisiana, is one of the hottest draft committees of all time.... BUT, if my list holds true, he might not be tonight's #1 pick.

Here are the things that could stop Joey Football from hearing his name first tonight.



  • 1

    The Draft Gets Cancelled

    While this is improbable at this point, never say never. If the higher-ups decide the draft can simply not go on amid the COVID-19 outbreak, and they reschedule altogether, that would stop Joe Burrow from being picked #1 tonight.

  • 2

    Burrow Removes Himself

    Maybe the draft gets closer and closer and the realization that he'll be a Cincinnati Bengal truly begins to set-in. That thought alone is enough to scare any man. If Joe decided to remove himself from the draft pool in order to avoid a career with the Bengals, he won't be tonight's #1 pick.

  • 3

    Bengals Decide to do Bengals Things

    This is probably the most realistic possibility. Anyone who knows 1% about NFL football is probably aware that Cincinnati is one of the poorest-ran clubs in the league. Maybe they just continue to be incredibly stupid and pass on the greatest college quarterback in history, after all, that would be a very "Bengals" thing to do.

  • 4

    COVID-19 Wipes out All of Humanity Before 7:00 PM

    Imagine a doomsday scenario where COVID-19 rapidly mutates and latches on to every living person within a few hours. With the mutation comes a disastrous 100% fatality rate. That, my friends, would be one of the few things that could actually stop Joe Burrow from being tonight's #1 pick.

  • 5

    Screw This List

    That's right, I'm all out of hilarious possibilities that could keep our boy away from that coveted #1 pick. Joe Burrow will be picked first tonight, and all of Louisiana will continue to celebrate our adopted son!


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