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How Being Stung by a Wasp Changed My Life Forever

Okay maybe not the first time they met but still
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Right now, I’m in Michigan to be the woman I’m going to marry this Friday. So, how did I go from being a chronically single, semi “famous” guy in Shreveport-Bossier to a man who is so in love he can hardly stand himself? It’s a long story, but in the end it’s mainly because of a wasp.

I guess we should start with a question: How does a guy in Shreveport get to be 33 years old and never be married nor have any kids? I don’t know honestly. I’d like to say that’s the path I had to walk in my life. Though that would imply that I wasn’t in control of what I was doing, that I wasn’t responsible for my (dumb) choices. To put it simply, I had some growing up to do.

So, how did I grow up? How did I “become a man”? Simmer down on those questions! Let me tell you a little about what happened in my world. It’s story time with Stifler.

For years — YEARS — I wanted to find a girl, get married and have kids. Just because I thought that would make me a man. (Which I know now is not the case.)

stifler djing a partySo, I set off looking for that girl. As I was not sure what to look for in a woman, I looked for a woman who I could take care of; a princess who needed a dragon slayed. Damsel in distress. That’s what guys did, right? Take care of a woman and her problems.

Looking back now, I see that not only was I exhausting myself trying to solve the world’s problems, but once those problems were solved I was off looking for new girl with new problems to solve. Because after the problems were solved why on God’s green earth would she need me?

Oh sure, my family and friends set me up with some amazing women. Women who would make any man happy to call them their girlfriend. However, I couldn’t see what I could offer these women who had it all figured out. I mean, I was supposed to be a dragon slayer. What would a woman like that need me for?

Screwed-up logic? Yeah. It just was what it was. So where did it all turn?

Well, I guess you can trace it back to my old co-worker and still good friend Shawn Dion. We’ve talked about EVERYTHING at some point.

I mentioned to him a few years back how I wanted to get back into acting I just didn’t know how. He called me one day to tell me that Richard Folmer was directing a play here in Shreveport called “I Remember Mama” and they needed an extra set of hands.

I jumped back into acting with both feet. I met some really great people, including a husband and wife named Tim and Myra. I’m not sure what they thought of me when I first met them. However, they did think I was worthy of meeting this girl they knew named Holly.

When I met her, I thought, ‘Wow. She’s funny, cute, sweet. She’s really got her stuff together. She’s really going to make some guy a happy man one day.’

A few days later I went out of town on vacation to spend time with family and friends in Dallas. After a couple of days there, I decided to head south to spend a couple of days in Galveston on whatever beach I could find. I didn’t even get south of I-20 in Dallas when my phone rang. It was my dad asking if I could come help him in the woods he camps at (his back is blown out and I do all the heavy lifting to help him out).

LFLamb, Flickr

Anyway, while we were there I got stung by a random red wasp (see above picture) on my hand and arm. It hurt, but I didn’t think it was a big deal. I told my dad let’s keep working.

Time went by and I started having an allergic reaction to the sting. A serious reaction: I could barely breathe, and every breath I took was painful. Pain and weakness overtook me from head to toe. I honestly felt like I was going to die.

Then, a random thought struck me: What was all that for? If this is the end, what did all the stuff I put myself through matter? I drove a car I hated, chose women based off how much they needed me, when what I really wanted was a woman who could also take care of me. A 50/50 relationship.

I decided at that moment that if I made it, I was going to do things differently.

For those of you at home keeping score, this is when everything changed.

As I’m typing all of this, it’s pretty obvious I made it. After two days of staying at my parents’ house recovering, I got up, went and bought a truck I’ve been wanting for a year and asked Holly out on a date.

We talked about that first date later on and both thought the same thing as we shared dinner at Olive Garden: this is the last person I’m ever going to date.

I knew she was a woman who not only I could complete, but completed me.

Long story short: I’m happy that I was stung by a wasp that almost killed me.

<3,
Stifler

close to a wedding picture as there is for now
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