Guide for Friending Females on Facebook

When it comes to relationship advice and an irreverent sense of humor, I can always count on one particular Facebook friend. Gerald Efferson Jr's quick wit and love advice are always spot on. I've stolen, with his permission, his list of rules for 'friending' women on Facebook as a man without being creepy. I've had to add a few things from the female point of view as well. However, while the ladies seem to love him online, like me, he's perpetually single. What gives?

Guys, it's possible to be single and not be 'that guy' on Facebook. Just follow these rules from Gerald that I've amended to reflect the female point of view!

1. She won't ever accept your friend request if you look like a 'goob' or look like you drive a white panel van in your profile picture
2. Don't ever post a thank you for accepting your friend request on her timeline. It looks desperate and let's face it, it's so Myspace.
3. Don't initiate a conversation via direct message. If she messages you, you're free to respond.
4. If she accepts your friend request, don't inundate her. We know you're excited at the thought of boobies, but you have to work your way up to frequent conversations.
5. Do not, I repeat, do not go through all her photos and 'like' stuff from anything past a month or so ago. Do like anything from further back makes you look like a total stalker.
6. Don't ask why she's single. If you do, then she can ask you why you're single and you want to hide that for as long as possible.
7. Be cool man. Only the guy without a chance is on every one of her pictures commenting about her beauty and virtue.
8. Don't ever say, 'I don't do this very often but...' We know you're lying.
9. Just be yourself. That way if you get blocked, you know why!
10. Don't ever poke or wave. It's ridiculous!
11. If she has great memes, by all means, steal them. All is fair when it comes to memes.